That's right. I feel greedy right now. I want things all to myself. But I guess that's what it's all about when you're and in shorts (if you forgive the minor paraphrase from the Janitor in Scrubs). I guess I'm just having one of those days where you feel as if you want things, and don't want to give anything to anyone. Ever. Might have to do something with the fact that I'm getting low on cash and need to find a job to pay the rent and the food for the rest of the summer. And I guess I'm not really greedy at all, not when you take a closer look at me. I love giving, in general. More than I do getting.
But this month as really been pissing on me, in so many ways. Paid a nice lady some money for renting a smoking, but I had to cancel that and didn't get the money back that I had to put out. It was all done in a bit of a rush in retrospect, but it was fun at the time and it got all fucked in the end. Like most things. And I've also been applying for some schools. I haven't gotten in to a single one. I guess I just want something back, you know? A little pick me up, although I can't afford it. I have to focus on getting an apartment and paying the bills so none of that for me. It'll all work out in the end... I hope.
But greed is a funny thing, isn't it? This is how greed is defined by Wikipedia:
"Greed is an excessive desire to possess wealth or goods with the intention to keep it for one's self. Greed - like lust and gluttony - is a sin of excess. Greed is inappropriate expectation. However, greed is applied to a very excessive or rapacious desire and pursuit of wealth, status, and power."
If that's the case we're all greedy. We all want things and want to keep them to ourselves. Is there really people who deep down aren't greedy?
It depends on whether the person deciding it is an optimist or a pessimist. From an optimistic point of view the greed, or hunger if you will, is something acquired along the road. If you're a pessimist we're all born greedy and then our parents suppress. I like to think it's a bit of both. Everyone is born with a survivalinstinct which I believe is "powered" by some sort of greed. We'd rather eat ourselves and survive rather than letting somebody eat and survive.That is, again depending on whether your an optimist or a pessimist, a kind of greed.
...I have no idea what I'm talking about. I'm stressed out, burnt out (well... not really) and afraid of what's to come (yes, really). I'll stop writing now.
